So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
