A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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