i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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