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my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Randomize
