Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
