Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
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