I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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