Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
