I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
you win again, gameday.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
