Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
