he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Randomize
