It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Success! We fucked roommates!
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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