Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
