so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
