I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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