At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
