In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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