Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Randomize