I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize