Walk of Shame. In a state park.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
