Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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