i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
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