Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
