the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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