is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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