im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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