Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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