we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
