I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
