have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize