idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Randomize
