I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
ok first of all what the fuck
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
