Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
