Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
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