you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
