just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
dude. I can hear the air.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize