Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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