We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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