called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize