Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I want to have your abortion
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
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