Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
