I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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