Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
