Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
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