Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
