I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
