What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
