Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Randomize
