How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
