Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize