all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
